Thursday, May 13, 2010

Adam and the Baloney



So Margie picked me up at the client in Jersey City and drove me home.  In the back seat was Adam the Wonder Baby.  He announced he was hungry and, nothing loathe, we stopped along the way at a Panera's.  Adam assumed the Mood Cranque and refused to eat the Grilled Cheese.  Okay.  That's it then.

But as we resumed the Journey Interrupted, Adam announced from the back seat that he wanted a baloney sandwich when he got home. 

No, you had your chance to eat.  Now you'll have to wait for dinner time. 

No, he told us, you have to feed me.  It's your job. 

Our job? 

Yeah.  If you don't feed me, I'll get sick again.  Then I might cough on you and you'll get sick, too.  (He then explained the Adam Theory of Communicable Diseases, of which Being Hungry was evidently one.) 

He repeated the "it's your job" argument several times.  Then, when we got home, he went to the drawer and got out the bread, to the fridge and got the baloney and a squeegee of Miracle Whip as well as the cheese.  All these he arranged on the counter and then summoned me to assemble them. 

I laid it all out for you, he explained. 

You 'laid it out' all by yourself? 

Yes, he said, most seriously.  I watch what people do.  Then I assume their powers. 

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